LMAO did anyone catch Simon’s “AAAAHHHH!” at the end of the 4/20 webcast when Aly hit his head? I definitely just replayed that 5 times.
Travis: Simon’s got the pirate’s bounty!
Simon: The booty…
(everyone cracks up)
(5 seconds later)
Simon: I meant the TREASURE! That’s what it means!
I’m not gonna lie, I like a nice butt. I’m just sayin’.
— Simon Cho, as submitted by Kiana
There are only two things that can cut diamonds: other diamonds and Simon Cho.
Simon Cho always knows the EXACT location of Carmen Sandiego.
Simon Cho once went skydiving, but promised never again. One Grand Canyon is enough.
When Arnold says the line “I’ll be back” in the first Terminator movie, it is implied that he is going to ask Simon Cho for help.
Simon Cho once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
Simon Cho sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
Simon Cho is not Politically Correct. He is just Correct. Always.
As President Roosevelt said: “We have nothing to fear but fear itself. And Simon Cho.”
Simon Cho never goes to the dentist because his teeth are unbreakable. His enemies never go to the dentist because they have no teeth.
The continents didn’t drift away from each other. They found out that Simon Cho was gonna be on America, so they all ran away.
Simon Cho doesn’t mow his lawn, he stands outside and dares it to grow.
When God sneezes, people say Simon Cho bless you.
Simon Cho’s immune system singlehandedly defeated the German army. The rest of the war was just for show.
The Titanic didn’t sink because of an iceberg, Simon Cho was just out for a swim.
Simon Cho once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.
I love their twitter convos :)
Simon Cho: Uggghh forget school. I’m just gonna try and get a sugar mama to take care of me for the rest of my life. Applications being accepted now.
Jordan Malone: @TheRealSimonCho ooooo oooo oooo Simon what about me!!!
Cho: …i need a WOMAN that will give me the keys to the lexus whiles shes at work. you have an acura bro! RT @J2K111 oooo Simon what about me!!!
Malone: @TheRealSimonCho So you want JR then… IC … didn’t know you where a brand name snob like Jeff… Sorry I’m too Acura(te) for you
Cho: @J2K111 that’s not the point i was trying to make! screw it i’ll just get back to my schoolwork now hahaha
Malone: @TheRealSimonCho what school work… or who should I say… aren’t you studying to be a porn star??
——
Oh man… was the a 2nd round KO for @therealsimoncho??? booo!!!!
Cho: [2 hrs later] dude i was studying! RT @J2K111 Oh man… was the a 2nd round KO for @therealsimoncho??? booo!!!!
Malone: @TheRealSimonCho studying…. for a comeback??? cause you failed that quiz!!
Cho: @J2K111 #YouCantBeSerious!
Malone: @TheRealSimonCho It’s ok man… go back to your school work =] Just make sure that school girl skirt doesn’t ride up too far..
Submitted by lauklee
